After an apparent union, the division slowly begins to arrive. On one side, the ultra-careful and paranoid, on the other, those who think this is just a flu.

Whoever thought that the pandemic was going to unite us as a species, is quickly realizing that it was obviously silly that thought. After an apparent initial union, the division begins: on one side, we have the ultra careful and paranoid ones who disinfect all the groceries at the supermarket and even wear a mask to speak for Zoom; on the other, who still thinks that this is just a flu and is licking flushing buttons at service stations.

In the first group, there’s a kind of person who stands out and they’re the Internet snitches.

A sort of 2.0 gatekeepers who like to see the lives of others and point their fingers at them on social networks. I think we need more people like that, people who know what’s best for society and who can be the surveillance agents that Portugal needs to control the pandemic.

So I leave here a job ad for anyone who wants to apply for the existing vacancies:

We are a young and dynamic company that is looking for young and dynamic people with a DNA that makes a fit and match in our culture that is young and dynamic as we have said, but it is never too much to mention. Do you like to point the finger at what others do wrong? Do you like to gossip about other people’s lives to forget yours, uninteresting? Do you like to put yourself on a moral pedestal without worrying about your glass roofs? Then this vacancy is for you.


  • Snitch on old domains that already don’t belong to you.
  • To observe the behavior of the condominium population and report to the management.
  • Use beach cam to monitor the flow of people on the beaches to complain about social networks. Even if the candidate has an Instagram feed full of pictures in houses with swimming pool since the beginning of the quarantine, this is not a problem. The lack of notion is a quality that we value in this young and dynamic company.
  • Possibility of undercover missions where you will have to go to the supermarket to cough up the fruit to test the inspection in force.